10.22.2011

I Want To Be An Excellent Wife

Proverbs 31:10 - 12 "An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life."

When I was engaged I promised myself that I would be an excellent wife. I would read all the right books. I would pray the right prayers. I would stay on God's good side, and always make the Lord my # 1. I would honour my husband by having an exemplary character and unwavering faith in the Lord. I would have children that are well-behaved and respect their parents. I would clean my house, decorate it to look like a magazine, and create the most perfect and healthy dinners. I would be an excellent wife.

I kept up the charade for about 4-months. I prayed and read my Bible diligently. I became heavily involved in our church and with our church family. I worked hard at home, ensuring our house was spotless and every meal was delicious and home-made. I prayed for and encouraged my husband, and did not argue with or belittle him. For the most part, anyway.

Then, four months after marriage we discovered that we were pregnant. Within a week of finding out (at about 6 1/2 weeks) I began experiencing morning sickness that lasted all day, extreme fatigue, and lower back pain.

Dishes piled up in the sink.
Dirt and dust collected on my floor and furniture.
I stopped cooking, and we starting eating out a lot more or opting for easy-to-make meals.
I stopped reading my Bible, and my prayers became less frequent.
I couldn't wake up for church in the morning.
I became disconnected from my friends and dropped most of my commitments.
I stopped encouraging my husband and praying for him. I became irritable and ungrateful.

Now, at 12-weeks, my life still looks quite "un-excellent". I haven't been to church in weeks. I haven't read my Bible in days. I haven't cleaned in weeks. I've neglected my husband in so many ways.

How can a pregnant woman who can barely move or be motivated to do simple things like brush her hair be an excellent wife? More importantly, how can she love and serve the Lord?

I think that I have become so overwhelmed by life and commitment that I have dropped everything. I know that I need to just prioritize. I need to read God's Word every day. I need to give my husband time each day to hear about his day and pray for him, even just for a few minutes. I need to pray for motivation and health on Sunday's, so that I can attend church. I'm still working out my feelings about other commitments, because I know that my focus does need to be on our baby right now.

I'm learning early that being a mother and a wife is a tough job that requires balance. I'm learning that keeping God my # 1 isn't easy but crucial. I'm learning that we simply can't do everything. I'm learning every day, and praying that through God's grace alone I can be an excellent wife.

1 comment:

  1. I really enjoy reading your blog posts. :) Thanks for being genuine, and encouraging me with the truth: Even when it's hard we need to keep Christ in the center of our lives!

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