4.21.2012

Should You Find Out The Sex Of Your Baby?


Should you find out the sex of your baby?

That's really only a question that the parents-to-be can answer, but I thought I'd share how we came to the decision to find out the gender of Baby Belle, and how we feel now that we know.

Before I became pregnant I always told myself that I would never, ever find out the gender of my baby. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I don't have pierced ears. I don't know how to work an Ipod. I like homemade bread. What does that have to do with finding out the gender of your baby? Nothing, but at the time I thought it did. I thought it was too modern and too progressive to find out the gender of your baby. What happened to the virtue of patience?

In September of last year I discovered I was pregnant, and although in a lot of ways my old-fashioned desires and instincts kicked in, I suddenly also felt very..."progressive." I wanted to know if I had a daughter or a son! I needed to know! Waiting until December 21 was difficult enough, nevermind having to wait until May!

We decided to find out the gender of the baby, and brought our mom's and our sister (Dan's sister) along. First, the ultrasound tech. told just Daniel and I, and afterwards we called our family in and told them together. I was positive I was having a boy. 100% positive. I was already calling my son by his name in my head.

Well, I was proven to be completely wrong when the ultrasound tech. confirmed that we were having a GIRL! A few months later we had her gender confirmed at our 3-D ultrasound.
As I near the end of my pregnancy I can't help but ask myself, "am I glad I found out I'm having a girl?" My answer is a big. fat. YES!

Here's why:

1) Knowing I'm having a daughter has helped me bond with my daughter. I hate when people refer to her as "it" or "he" and always correct them. I just love her. I've been able to really bond with her as a little tiny person. It's made the thought of having a child less abstract by knowing exactly what gender my child is.
2) I can pray more specifically for her. Boys and girls are different. Knowing I'm having a daughter means I pay attention a bit more when I read about parenting girls. It means I can pray specifically for her precious little girl heart. I can pray for the woman that she will one day be.
3) We can call her by name. One major mistake we made is telling a lot of people our daughter's name (MAJOR mistake). Next time, nobody will know. However, we have been able to call our daughter by her name and it has just made her so much more real to us. It also helps because you don't need to argue with your spouse over a name of the opposite gender, and only need to focus on the one name. PS: If you do know her name PLEASE don't write it on my wall or on this blog. It's still private and we are still trying to keep her name a surprise for the people we know who don't know the name!!

Overall, we're so happy we found out the sex. Waiting for our baby to arrive has truly tried my patience. This last week has been extremely difficult for me. I want to hold my baby. I want to meet her. I can only imagine how much more impatient I'd be if I still didn't know if she was a she, or a he.

We will for sure find out the gender of our future children. Hope that helps for couples who are on the fench about finding out the gender of their little one!

note: I'm in no way saying that our decision to find out the gender of Baby Belle is superior to people who choose to wait! Just sharing how we've felt about our decision!

4 comments:

  1. agreed, all!

    in addition, for me, I wanted to plan the nursery and have a stocked closet of clothes, because I knew once baby came I'd be in the house a lot and have no free time.

    plus, the biggest reason was that I didn't want the surprise on THAT day. It was still a surprise the day we found out (it bothers me when people say otherwise!), but with all the emotions and intensity of giving birth (and potential for postpartum depression), I wanted something to be expected and sure.

    Not to mention, when I found out Olivier was a boy I actually was bummed for a few minutes... I wanted all girls haha! Of course the following days and months lead to me being REALLY excited and now I'm so thankful to have a boy, but I'm glad I had that adjustment period :)

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  2. i understand where you are coming from Brianna. But as a mom that didn't find out, there's nothing that could convince me to find out a second time. For me, NOT knowing was a motivator, not a test in patience. So it was actually more helpful not to find out, instead of the other way around.
    But it's good that you know yourself and what you prefer!!

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  3. I am so excited for you, Dan, and Baby-Belle, the day is getting close so fast. :D

    May God bless your family greatly :D

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  4. It's going to be a while before I have babies, but I think I would prefer to not find out before hand. I just want the surprise the day of. If I did find out ahead of time, I'd keep it a secret just for my husband and I!

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