The last few months that I worked at Redeemer were really hard for me. I was experiencing awful morning sickness (more like, all day sickness), and major fatigue. My heart just wasn't in my job any more, and I wasn't the only one aware of it. I knew for months that my job loss was just around the corner. I seriously wasn't sure if I'd be getting fired or laid off, but in the end, most likely do to being "in the family way", I was laid off.
It was hard. At first, I felt like a total failure. I was embarrassed because although I could say that I was laid off, I knew in my heart that likely wasn't the entire truth. I still remember finding Daniel (he attended Redeemer and we lived on campus for another six-months after being laid-off, lucky me). I called him and he came to my office right away. I embraced him and sobbed. I was confused, upset, hurt, but also...relieved.
My sadness towards being laid-off lasted approximately one-hour. If that. I had tons of time to think about it, so we had financial help in place already, and in our hearts we had already accepted the job loss. Pretty soon I started thinking of my new employment status as a blessing, and not a curse.
I couldn't have been more RIGHT. The last six-months I had before my daughter arrived, I was able to enjoy with my husband. There was still stress, but not having any work stress or worrying about waking up at 7:30am was beautiful. I could wake up, puke, sleep...eat a bit...puke some more. I was able to focus on preparing for Penelope, caring for my home and my husband, and ensuring I got lots of rest.
Daniel and I had our fair share of adventures too. I had lots of fun adjusting to my new job, and was able to really mentally prepare for this new season in my life.
A year later, I am so thankful that I had that time. God truly did bless me by giving me that six-month grace period to enjoy with Daniel and my Baby Belle (remember when we called Penelope that??) I'd spent half my time as a stay-at-home mom with Pen outside of the world, as well as inside of my belly. I'm so honoured to be able to call myself a stay-at-home mom, and to be able to focus my time and energy on raising up our daughter. It hasn't been easy, but the past twelve months have been the most rewarding, exciting, refreshing, and joy-filled of my whole life.
I can't wait to see what the Lord has planned for the next twelve months!
notice Dan's shirt here...anticipating our Penelope!
believe it or not, I still had over a month left!